TRANSFORMING MISFORTUNE INTO MEANING
As we pass through the Seven Gateways to become a true
Enchanted Self, we see that life is all about living and then telling and
retelling the stories of our lives to get the most positive juice from our
stories.
This often means taking pain and misfortune and turning it
into meaning and even eventually a metamorphosis of pleasure. One example of
designing a fulfilling life comes to mind. This is the story of a part of our
French cousin's life. A retired doctor living outside of
Others chose not to leave
Jean Manuel told us about how his family went back after the
war to look for their missing relatives, only to find possessions and an
uneaten birthday cake celebrating the nephew's first birthday still on the
table at one of their cousin's homes. The family, however, was gone forever. He
remembers his parent's despair, yet also how life resumed for all of them.
He also shared with us how his father was once picked up by
the French Police and loaded onto a train. Fortunately the train was moving
slowly enough that his father could jump and escape, living for a while in the
woods until he could return to his little family.
One might at first wonder-how could a person come to terms
with so much loss and seeing his family go through so much pain? I don't know
Jean Manuel terribly well but I have clearly seen a friendly, joyful person
every time we've been together. I have a hunch of several ways he has processed
this story of his life and the life of his family.
I believe that one of the major ways that he has processed
his own life and turned it into a meaningful, joyful experience is by giving
back. The farmer and his wife who took them in didn't have any children of
their own. Jean Manuel and everyone else that was hidden by them,
never forgot them. They visited this couple every summer. To this very day, although
the husband is gone, and the wife lives in a nursing home, Jean Manuel or his
wife, or sometimes his daughter will take responsibility to visit and be with
this woman. They never forgot and they've always been good to the people that
were good to them.
Perhaps the other major way that I know that this man had
made his life story into a meaningful life adventure is the way I feel when I
am with him. He is a pleasant, reassuring person who makes me feel comfortable,
safe, and as if there is a good time lurking around every corner. I think he is
a lovely example of someone living an enchanted life... a life that has had to
be reinterpreted, I'm sure, more than once... a life that is not a life of fame
but of private meaning and consistency.
— © Dr. Barbara Becker
In private practice
since 1981, Dr. Barbara Becker
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