Hunger is a horse (subconscious mind) function, like thirst, the need to reproduce, and nicotine and morphine addictions. Your body hears hunger as a call to action. Genetic memory pushes us to eat when food is available and rest when it isn’t. With refrigerators and cupboards full of food this doesn’t work, but evolution takes thousands of years to make even the smallest changes.

To have freedom about food for the rest of your life, learn to:

Shift hunger from a call to action on which survival depends, [and it is when it is totally unconscious (this is how every living creature "hears" hunger)] to HEAR hunger as a feeling. Start by saying "That’s how hunger feels" instead of "I am hungry." Be willing to feel hunger, and not act on it. Congratulate yourself on feeling hungry, since it means you’ve eaten less today than you did yesterday.

Think sex. Every creature will risk its life to reproduce, but we’ve learned to enjoy the feeling we call "turned on." Sometimes we let it be a call to action, but more often we interpret it as a feeling, and we have the choice to act or not.

When you recognize hunger as a feeling, you have power over it. You won’t ever totally control it, so don’t expect that. You want to eat, and fully enjoy, the foods you passionately want. You just want to be able to turn away from the foods that you eat out of boredom, habit, or the need for comfort.

Waste food with gusto. Restaurants serve far more than one person needs, so share or take it home or throw it away. There is no virtue in eating one atom more than you passionately want. Every additional bite is one you will wear for the rest of your life. Wasting food is hard at first: do it anyway. It will get easier.

No matter how much you love it, how much it cost, how long you waited for it, how much trouble someone went to—when you don’t passionately want the next bite, stop. I’ve made all kinds of lame excuses to carry my plate away from the table so I can dump it in the garbage. I don’t assume people will understand so I don’t try to explain. I used to eat it, feel a bit naughty, laugh about it. Now I feel a bit naughty about pitching it, laugh about that, and don’t wear the calories.

Make changes slowly and gently. You are treating yourself better than ever before. You are protecting yourself from abuse and nurturing yourself with healthy foods. You have every right to feel proud and pump that serotonin.

Find comfort foods that don’t abuse you. Here are some that work for me—homemade mashed potatoes, a lemon lollipop, a frozen fruit juice bar. For real comfort I call a friend.

Reduce milk fat by cutting down ½ percent at a time till you get to skim milk. Put a little less butter on stuff for a week, then a little less than that. Shine your bread with whipped butter, you’ll get the taste with a lot less fat. You’re living in the non-suffering section, so no martyrdom is allowed. Just easy, tiny changes that then become better habits.

As I said last week, you have to exercise too, to keep your metabolism up as you eat fewer calories. Join me in the water aerobics class, walk, bike, whatever you love to do. You’ll feel better, love life more, have better sex. No kidding!

--- © Jeneene L. Brengelman

For those of you who want more help controlling your weight, I’ve put together a kit called The Keys to Lifetime Weight Control. It includes a motivation/ hypnotherapy tape, for $20 including postage. Email: